ستاره قطبی ...

it was one year ago, August 2017, when we decided to apply for Australia permanent visa, during the last year we spend hard time full of disappointment, change of mind, illness and so many other negative things.

now I am at the point that is in the middle of the way, most likely I will get my visa in the next 6 months.

my heart is full of worries and confusion. and no happiness at all. how to find job, how to settle down, how to learn and do so many new things in the new country, how to leave my hometown and country, how to start my life from the beginning with only to suitcase as the result of last 35 years, how to say goodbye to my family, and specially my bother, what will happen to my little son, who will be just 2.5 years old, and loneliness and loneliness and loneliness......

yes, I am so alone, I have been alone during all this year process and there is no help and assurance to make me confident and calm.

my husband is here, but not such a help, not only there is no help from him, but also I should even worry about him, how to get 4.5 in IELTS, how to fill the form for the job application...

anyway, that is it, there is no use in wishing someone else or to be in the situation in a different way...

..... I will cope with it...... I should be strong... I repeat this sentence every day to my self